The Second Attempt - January

Well, I did a little better with the Second Attempt. I didn't knock anything over, at least. Well, nothing important, anyway. And it was less traumatic, and I breathed through my mouth, and I figured out a much more comfortable position. It was still pretty freaky though, and I felt bad because Quiet has a cold and is miserable, and here I was, 'Fill 'er up, please!', throwing an empty cup at him.

My worry for today is paying for college, because I watched a Lifetime move where this family has to use the college fund for mom's medical bills (she gets really fat, then develops diabetes and finally has a heart attack). How much is college tuition now? What if Alistair wants to go out-of-state? What if I start one of those Education-specific funds, but he/she doesn't want to go to college? Quiet told me to shut the hell up and wait 20 years. But those are the things that people don't think about until too late. I think part of my constant wake-up-in-the-middle-of-the-night panic is the fact that no matter how great my friends or housemates or family are, it's all up to me. That's what it comes down to. My child's ultimate success or failure in this world, his/her basic comforts (bacon, shelter, Skechers), all of that is my financial responsibility.