Today's Sanity Brought to You By Pepsi

In today’s update, I am both

a.) Bleeding from the eyes
b.) Not bleeding from anywhere else

So at least I’m not menstrual-cranky, which is good because I’m I-hate-to-try-sleeping-in-a-hotel cranky. SO DRY. And of all the places to forget putting in eye drops, yours truly flaked out last night. After a lukewarm painful meal of disgusting KC bbq (my short end tasted oddly like an enchilada, which is definitely not how rib sauce should taste), I worked for another 5 hours and then tried to crash. No luck. Lots of blanket-kicking and nightmares about work while being occasionally tormented by someone singing in the stairwell next to my room. Oh, and Loud’s mother inexplicably called me at 1:30 am to hang up.

I’ve got a bag of Gardetto’s and 40 fluid ounces of Pepsi in me so I’m not asleep yet. As if I had to wake up at 6:00 am because the other Kronos people I’m with are ‘morning people’! F-ers. I have become even LESS of a morning person if possible, is what I have learned so far on this trip. This is most likely as a result of two years of my extremely quiet, peaceful, work-from-home ease-into-the-day routine. What I don’t want to hear at 7:00 am is, ‘So when I had my hysterectomy…’ and loud, braying laughter following similar stories.

Since I’m still not allowed to think about whether or not I’m preggers (which I am 99% positive I am not), it’s very frustrating to be sitting in an empty cubicle with nothing to do in a room that is 147 degrees and smells like WalMart perfume. I can’t wait til Alistair reads this someday and is like, ‘Man I knew my mom was a whiner, but this is brutal’. Seriously, I hate being so useless. I think I’m going to go sign up to be a Pampered Chef consultant online.